Hey Everyone! (photos will be uploaded on this post soon). Come back!
Welcome Back! Yes! It surely has been a minute since my last blog. The next few blogs will focus more on how I am succeeding with my new sistasizing program. Today, I just want to give a little attention to how, what and why I believe I gained so much weight, the pitfalls, and the bottom that got me to moving again. However, we will not linger in the what happen, because that will not get us where we want to be. We want to be SISTASIZING!
Allow me to preface by saying this is my truth and my reality. I know everyone has there own reality as to how and why they experience weight gain, but this is my story. As a mature and fairly enlightened woman, I could sum it up by saying “I stopped caring”. However, I do beleive that there has been a series of circumstances that precluded me from doing what was best for me in the last few years.
In 2004, I was healed and survived (Synovial Sarcoma) and the aggressive cancer treatment of chemotherapy, radiation, and invasive surgery. Six months after my intense physical therapy, my dear mother Ramogene Parker came to visit me in Santa Cruz, CA. She went into a diabetic coma during her visit with my sister Charlotte Parker in Oakland, California. She was rushed to the hospital. It was there that we all discovered that she had end stage renal failure - kidney disease. She never went back home to live alone in her house. Instead, I took it on to care for her here in California.
I toured from 2002 to 2004. I had gone from a year of international travel to Italy, Spain, and Holland to diagnosis, treatment and recovery. With doctor’s approval, we travelled to Greece during my treatment.Then mama came to visit. If she did not do dialysis, she would die! She had limited strength. “You only have one mother”, so I moved my mother into my own home. Mom and I got to know one another really well. I took her to dialysis, combed her hair, gave her the medication she needed, bathed her, hired help to assist me with her care, and sang to her everyday. We bonded after many year’s of geographical distance between Gary and Sana Cruz. Mama lived almost two years with me in that little home in Santa Cruz, CA. I do not regret a minute of my care-giving experience with her. She was in an out of comas, the hospital, nursing homes, and rehabilitation centers . It was exhausting!
You see, I had lost some weight before treatment, and pretty much maintained it during treatment. But, when mama came and the tragedy of her illness was upon me, my attention to exercise, healthy food, and rest went out the window. It was all about keeping her alive. The weight started when I ate between trips from home to dialysis - I worried and I went to McDonald’s KFC, Burger King, donut shops, Mexican food, Chinese dining - all fat producing food items. Eating on the run! No time for self. Plus, I was working and gigging to pay for my mother’s care. I ate for comfort!
Then there were other relationships that got the best of me. “I stopped caring”.
I read somewhere that 60% of care-givers get gravely ill or die before the person with whom they are caring for. This is because of lack or rest, stress, and poor eating. I called my brothers and told them that I needed a break. If they didn’t accept mama back in Gary, Indiana and care for her there, there might be two people coming home in a casket. I was tired! Getting fat and tired! My brothers did take mama in early 2006. Shortly after her move - my mother passed away in October 2006. My mother passed away. I ate!
Fast forward - I started travelling, touring, eating road food, panckaes, waffles, fried chicken, greasy foods and cakes. What was eating me? The loss of two very special people in my life - all in a short period of time after I battled cancer. For comfort I ate. I sat down and I did not move. The stage was my best friend, but I could not stand through an entire set because of months of eating poorly and being sedentary.
The reason I call this post “What was eating me?” is because I think that there is always some emotional link to huge weight gain. Some back story that people might assume, but don’t know. They just see the weight gain. That was my past that continued until I hit bottom. My fans loved me, but some stopped coming to see me. Seeing me sitting was not pleasureable for them. People want to see Sista Monica standing, dancing and having a good time. I know it! So I took action! I am focused now! Since February 2011 I have lost 53 pounds.
Stay tuned for the weeks ahead as I recaputure the steps I have taken to lose 53 pounds so far. I’m back!
I’m Sista Monica and I am Sistasizing!
Wow! Thanks for sharing your journey, Sista M! I know about the comfort in food, and I TOTALLY continue to support you in thought and prayer as you continue to journal and sistasize!! You GO, Sista!!